Dr. B’s Professional Blog Spotlight: Jillian Szafranski
“Using the body to resource ourselves is how we get our brains back to the truth—-that we are safe.”
-Jillian Szafranski, Yoga Therapist for Eating Disorders & Trauma Body Worker, Founder of Healing Arts Yoga + Bodywork
In this professional spotlight, Dr. Ballardo had the pleasure of interviewing Jillian Szafranski. Jillian is a yoga therapist for eating disorders and trauma body worker. She is also the founder of Healing Arts Yoga + Bodywork.
Jillian is a Los Angeles-based instructor who offers office yoga, yoga therapy for those in recovery, energetic massage, and annual transformation yoga retreats. Her training is rooted in Alexander and Linklater Techniques which she learned while attending Emerson College in Boston. Drawing enormous inspiration from the ever-developing field of neuroscience, Jillian uses her knowledge of anatomy and somatic integration (a therapeutic technique that combines the mental, emotional, spiritual to the physical body) to craft a proprietary hands-on approach to yoga that is informed by her own experiences with physical trauma and illness to practice trauma informed yoga therapy for those in recovery. Jillian created the Yoga Therapy Program for Reasons Eating Disorder Centers as well as the Office Yoga Programs for the Los Angeles Metropolitan Transportation Authority and NPR (National Public Radio).
Read more to find out how Jillian approaches yoga, mind-body connection, and warning signs of what happens when we disconnect from our bodies.
Dr. Ballardo: Mindfulness is quite a popular thing that one can find on the internet. It seems like a lot of people want to talk about it these days! How do you define mindfulness?
Jillian: You’re right, it's a word that gets used so much in this work. The last time I said it was probably something like, “Mindfully notice your breath...or be mindful of where you feel the ground or places of physical support.”
I’m going to boil this down simply, which I think is always the most effective and humane way of safely entering the arena with the uncertainty of emotions that ripple through the body during the healing process—-asking ourselves to be mindful is asking ourselves to be aware, present in this moment, regardless of our opinion of it—-Your butt on the mat. The back of your hand on your knee. The light coming into the room. The tightness in our throat...etc.
Mindfulness is simply being aware.
Dr. B: How is yoga a practice of mindfulness?
Jillian: Yoga is a practice of telling the truth. Moment by moment. How am I feeling now? Where do I need more support now? Do I need to rest? Is this painful or is this just uncomfortable? Being honest, especially when it comes to the body, or how we are feeling is not always easy. Once upon a time it was, but SO much has happened to each of us that has taught us to do just about anything other than hang out with our honest selves.
Yoga isn’t just a practice of telling the truth, it’s a practice of listening. And sometimes it asks us to simply accept or hear the truth, and then other times our practice is requesting we take action. Often that action is contrary to what we have been taught or what we have been brilliantly avoiding.
Dr. B: Are all types of yoga a mindful practice?
Jillian: My simple answer, YES. What I believe to be true about yoga is that it links the mind and body, creating connection. So yes, if a person is doing yoga, it creates the perfect storm for mindfulness.
However, because I’ve been working in the eating disorder community for over 11 years and because I’m a human who lives in a body that has experienced trauma (like all bodies), I know how easily yoga practices can be exploited. In my early 20’s I used to practice yoga with a lot of love and passion, but I now know that I was not practicing mindfully. My practice was ego driven and competitive. As an athlete, dancer and former competitive gymnast I don’t fault myself for even a moment about how I naturally took to the poses. Oddly enough, it wasn’t until my health issues swooped in and redirected me to a less is more approach that I eventually stopped pushing. I slowed way down and started to do less and connect more. I began to realize that although in the past I was doing really impressive poses and could keep up in just about any advanced class, I was unconsciously dissociating and only allowing my body to communicate with me in one very extreme way. There were so many undercurrents and channels that I couldn't tune into. There was so much territory that belonged to me that I wasn’t exploring.
I want to be clear—I’m not saying that if you practice complicated asanas (poses) you aren’t being mindful, that was just my experience. Today I have a much more blended, grey area practice.
Dr. B: What happens when we are disconnected to our bodies?
Jillian: Fake news happens. Conspiracy theories take over and we start to fear our bodies instead of seeing them as our allies.
We know that our brains have a built in negative bias, this isn’t a bad thing, it’s actually incredible. It helps us detect potential threats so that we can protect ourselves. When there is a history of unexplored or unresolved trauma our alarm bells become even more hijacked. The combination of this distortion with our brain’s natural negative bias further complicates our ability to right-size the alerts our brain is sending our body.
The alarm bell goes off in the brain, but isn’t felt in the brain, it’s felt in the body. If we don’t take the time to reorganize and offer some legit truth to the false threat our brains set off, you can see how we can start to not only fear the outside triggers, but also our own bodies, because that’s where the awful feeling is housed. And that just reinforces another reason why being in our bodies feels awful and why we should disconnect.
Using the body to resource ourselves is how we get our brains back to the truth—-that we are safe. Are we actually okay? Are we safe? Are we breathing? Where in the body do we feel grounded, strong or neutral? Who in our life loves us? Who in our life makes us laugh the most, puts us at ease?
We are not in that past moment, we are here, with unlimited tools and support. We are not stuck and we do have choices. The body aids the brain in creating new neurological pathways. We often hear about fight/flight/freeze, but there is a fourth technique, and that’s often referred to as tend & befriend. Your body is your greatest ally. It really is how we get our stubborn and often shortsighted reptilian brain to grow your God given pathways to freedom.
Dr. B: What are some of the warning signs that someone may be feeling disconnected to our bodies?
Jillian: I can list a few, but it’s important to remember they can show up differently for each person. Disconnection isn’t always overt, it can be subtle, especially for someone who has an active lifestyle or yoga practice. Presenting as connected is very different from authentic connection. These are common signs of disconnect I see often in my professional practice.
Numbness: When a patient presents or states feeling numb. And yet, I believe that naming feeling numb or disconnected is a form of connection and awareness...it’s a really incredible place to start actually.
Inability to notice or feel the breath: I’m less concerned if someone can’t take a deep breath. I do however want them to connect to some breath sensation, even if it’s subtle. Breath work and creating space in the torso is a great way to access this.
Sensing Time and Space: Not being able to orient to where they are can be really concerning. A great way to simplify this is by creating actual physical support. Put a cushion under their seat or their back against the wall. Ask them where they feel the physical contact. Have them name simple, frontal lobe connecting facts about the room. Colors, shapes, textures, smells. Bringing their attention and voice into the room will likely stimulate their diaphragmatic breathing as well.
Dr. B: How have you seen clients talk about what’s different off the yoga mat once they’ve started to connect to their bodies?
Jillian: Yes...the hope is not to be excellent at conquering crazy poses on a private mat island, but to feel empowered to connect to our bodies while being visible to others. We do yoga to strengthen and deepen the capacities of all of our relationships.
I had a client go back home to visit her family. Due to COVID-19, she couldn't go to a yoga studio, so she practiced yoga in her family’s living room via zoom. This was the same home that she experienced a lack of safety and endured trauma. When she started to practice her brain sent a quick alarming message, “Are you sure you want to let your guard down and get vulnerable on the mat here?” Historically this space has not been safe for her and her brain was doing everything it could to alert her body. She was able to right-size the alarm. She checked back in and scanned herself and her surroundings. In the here and now, she was safe. In fact she explained to me that staying on the mat and completing the class, using all of the tools she has accumulated, doing the literal somatic body work in the place where she experienced her initial threat/traumas left her feeling overcome with accomplishment. It deepened her capacity to trust herself. She said, “The whole point of practicing this work on the mat to use it off the mat. It was actually so empowering.”
Dr. B: What sort of recommendation do you have for people who tell you that they do not like yoga or breathing?
Jillian: I thank them for their honesty and ask them to show up the best that they can. I also tell them that most of the yoga I have taken out in the world I really dislike too. I never take their dislike personally. If they are resistant I request they give the opening grounding sequence, which is about 5-10 minutes a try. If they still don’t want to join I encourage them to observe and I give them simple somatic work to do in a chair or at a wall. I also make sure to share some enlightening and freeing scientific information about the nervous system. I can’t tell you how many times I have seen a complete turn around with disinterested clients when they finally start understanding simple science—that the way they have adapted to feel/process/live in the world is totally normal and in many cases life saving!
Showing up and staying in the room is such an act of self love, even if it doesn’t feel like it in the moment. The brain and the body have no choice but to receive it. And that, my friends, is yoga.
To start yoga with Jillian Szafranski, please check out her Instagram and/or website:
IG: @yogi.jillian
For more information on Healing Arts Yoga + Body work or to sign up for Sunday Somatic Yoga with Jillian @10am via Zoom, click here.